Dating 101
by silverserpent08
Summary: Heero feels that he is...missing something. Duo is being an ever helpful coach. And what does everyone else think? 1x? There will be some het and some slash and I'm not telling whose being with who, though you can guess by looking at my other stories.
1. Chapter 1

So...um... I'm officially two days late on the wholle once a week thing. PLease don't hurt me.

And well to resolve the issue, I've decided to post a chapter of another story I've been working on...PLEASE DON'T HURT ME.

Anyways this is it. It's kind of a teaser. Hopefully I'll be back on track by next Thursday. I know there isn't much to review on in this chapter, but they would still be nice.

Hope you enjoy.

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Dating 101

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Heero noted Duo's eyes on him again

Heero noted Duo's eyes on him again. Lately Duo had been watching him quite frequently. Heero did a quick mental once over of himself and found that there was nothing that he thought would cause alarm to come over his braided ally. After all, there had been few missions from Une recently, meaning he wasn't suffering from any physical damage. Heero frowned in puzzlement; why had Duo been observing him for days?

Heero, being Heero, paused for one moment longer before turning in his swivel chair and facing the violet eyes, which widened slightly, a wide grin was already sweeping over the face to hide it. "Duo. For what reason have you been observing me and my actions over the past six days, three hours, and twenty four minutes?"

The Cheshire cat grin dimmed to a smirk, "I was just trying to figure out what makes you tick Heero."

"What do you mean? Specify."

"What are your habits? What do you do when you don't work?" Duo shrugged gesturing slightly with his hands, "You know…what else your life consists of? How do you not get bored?"

Heero frowned, "Well my life consists of missions, work, daily exercise and training, mission planning and sleep." Duo seemed slightly less amused then normal, something in his eyes. It was unreadable….

"So you're not missing anything? At all?" Heero looked the picture of puzzled and shrugged.

"Not in the sense that I need something." He waited for a moment, tense, waiting for Duo to pounce into action. What he got was a simple shrug.

"Ok then." Duo turned back to his seat and began writing, "As long as your happy man. That is all that matters to me." Heero watched him for another thirty seconds before turning back to his desk. That had been an interesting yet unproductive conversation and Heero still had work to worry about…

That night, Heero had unlocked his apartment and gone about his ritual of exercise, follow up work, hygiene maintenance and dinner. It got to be around 9:30 when he found himself turning in for the night. Lying down usually meant that he would be out within two minutes, but he had been thinking on what Duo had said in the back of his mind. Was he bored right now? No. Not that he knew of…

There was no desire to get up and move or accomplish some task. There was no desire to sleep either. But there was something amiss…. what, he didn't know as he had felt it several times before but never taken the time to analyze or solve the condition. It was kind of… slight discontent that made his chest constrict when thinking about it…. That made a dull hollow sensation in him when Duo hugged some random person or Trowa hugged Quatre for that matter. Per haps… it was the sensation that Duo had mentioned before….. Boredom perhaps….like Duo had been mentioning.

It somewhat fit the description … perhaps he should ask Duo about it tomorrow. Maybe he just needed a new challenge.

* * *

TBC...

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So yeah... Sorry for posting another new fic...but I did it. so...

-Ciao,

Silverserpent


	2. Chapter 2

Woopty-WOO! I did it. I stayed on schedule again! Yeah! I've put up seven chapters from various stories of mine in the last month. Do you know how freaking impressive that is for me? Yeah.

So... Thank you for the first reviews of the first teaser/chapter. I know there wasn't much, but I hope you will like this chapter!

P.S. The reason I haven't really put any parings is that there are going to be a lot...but I'm not all are going to be permanent. That's kind of a hint...If you are turned off by these initial chapters.

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Ch 02

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Heero arrived to work early the following day. Well not that early for him, but for everyone else it was early. He liked it better that way, not many people to deal with. The receptionist in the lobby was there already as well, despite it being an early five thirty am. She leaned over the desk as he scanned his badges to enter the elevator to the right of the desk. "Morning Heero." He nodded to her and entered the elevator quickly, hitting floor fifty seven. The woman was here every morning very early as opposed to other employees. She had an excellent work ethic and seemed to have good people skills. Too bad she wasn't an agent. She probably would be just as efficient in her job.

The elevator doors sprang open and Heero stepped out immediately locating the only other person awake and at work this early, Wufei. He nodded to Wufei across the office who nodded back as he had immediately noticed Heero's presence in the empty floor. It was their usual routine; they did still have their wartime instincts after all. That was all he and Wufei would see of each other for the remainder of the work day. Duo acted as their go between. For some reason he felt obligated along with Quatre to keep everyone informed of everyone else's business.

Heero proceeded to his office on the other half of the floor behind the elevator shaft. Heero was the number one agent of field operations. Anytime a mission came up he was the first to be sent out, unless it was deemed easy enough for another field agent to complete. He was in the process of prepping for several missions to be sent out soon. There was still a Field Missions Manager, the one who organized who did what on what kind of time table and adjusted in case a threat flared up faster then previously thought. His name was Thomas Riechte, very organized, with a military background that would assist him in assignment dispatching. He was also an assistant coordinator to agent training. Heero had been offered that job before it was given to Thomas, but he declined. It wouldn't have worked.

Duo's position had no official title. He swung between departments based on where he was needed. Everyone knew him and everyone loved him. If they need a demolitions expert, there he was. If a mission required infiltration and reconnaissance, there he was. If some one needed field training, he appeared to be their partner for the drill. If someone needed personal advice, yes...there he was.

Wufei was in his own world as far as Heero could tell. Heero would never want to do his job, or knew how he did it. Wufei was Head of the Investigations Department. That was his official title. From what Heero could tell, between random office gossip and Duo's ranting at him and the occasional mission or lunch break crossover, he was head controller and planner of all reconnaissance missions, head of interrogations, leading witness on behalf of the Preventers Organization for all trials that made it to the international courts, and for some reason his personal favorite part of the job was head of Drug and Gun Traffic Control. He had a job that required him to manage everything in every department that could be potential evidence for an investigation, follow up every single lead or tip from the public. He planned all major investigational missions, and investigated the ones that had just barely enough substantial proof to warrant a possible threat and he had upwards of five hundred thousand people to do it for him across the earth and in the colonies, all at his disposal.

Heero thought he was insane to take that position on. It just happened; Wufei was coming out of space where he and Sally had been working and was suddenly assigned to the position. Heero couldn't believe that he would deny himself the field agent position. Heero couldn't imagine doing anything else.

Perhaps that was why he was feeling this… bored sensation all the time. Although each mission was unique in its own way, such as 'should they enter through the air ducts or the underground parking structure?' it all was generally, break enter, detain, and prevent public casualties. Maybe he was thinking about it too much. He did enjoy his job.

Heero started working away on his mission reports and the halls started slowly filling with noise as other employees arrived for the work day. Heero looked up at the clock. He would be here by now, it was seven am. Heero paged Duo, as you never really knew where Duo was, just that he was somewhere in the building between the hours of seven and five. In fact Heero had never seen Duo's office, or knew its location.

Less then two minutes later Duo popped his head into the office, holding his morning cup of coffee. "Hey Ro, what can I do for ya? Do you have a mission that you require me for?" He snuck in and sat on a low filing cabinet.

Heero observed Duo sitting on the filing cabinet and shrugged, it was practical as there were no other chairs in the vicinity. "No. No mission." Heero shook his head and continued as Duo's brows furrowed, "Yesterday you noted that I might be bored. I think you may be correct. How can I fix this sensation?"

"Really?" Duo put his coffee cup down as Heero nodded earnestly at him, "Well gee Heero, what do you think needs to be done?"

Heero frowned. He was supposed to be getting advice not assessing his own issue. "Perhaps I need a new challenge."

Duo nodded and looked around Heero's pristine orderly office. "A challenge would work. Now we need to figure out how to challenge you. Well, you are number one in your missions, shooting, running drills, and training operations. You have a flawless mission record, so your working status has nothing to challenge you with." Heero nodded in agreement. It was his personal mission to be one hundred percent efficient in all work related fields.

"Now I want you to think about this before you react, Heero and do not be offended." Duo looked at him till he nodded his assent. "What if you were to develop yourself socially, say attempt a date or two?" Heero paused and pondered it, while Duo looked as if he was handling a live grenade.

Heero finally admitted, "That would be a challenge."

And Duo nodded sagely, keeping his mouth shut.

"But I do not know where to begin."

"That my friend is what I am here for." Duo had a big grin on his face. "I'm gonna make this so ridiculously easy for you, this feeling will go away so fast you won't know what hit you."

"You mean boredom."

Duo shrugged and picked up his coffee cup, "Sure, buddy." He took a sip and hopped off the filing cabinet. "I'll be back later to tell you the master plan!" Then he was whipping around the corner and out of sight.

* * *

Heero was eating lunch in the cafeteria as usual. He had been first in line to grab a ham sandwich as usual and been sitting alone in the corner table with his back to the wall as usual. Everything was normal... It would take him exactly ten minutes in the cafeteria and he would return o his desk. It was his usual routine of course.

Then again his usual routine never really accounted for one Duo Maxwell. Five minutes into his meal the braided man approached him and sat across from him leaning against the side wall grinning at him. Heero looked at him, telling to proceed with his business.

"I've got it." He chirped, "I've got what can distract you from the boredom in your life and give you a new challenge to push you to your limits and increase your adaptability."

"Yes your socialization method was stated earlier." Heero nodded intently and alert.

Duo grinned, "Yes, but now I have the girl." He was practically shaking with excitement. Heero did not know what would be so exciting about this news, but nodded for Duo to proceed. He did without hesitance, "It's the girl at the reception desk in the front lobby; her name is Shirley. The girl that is always here so flipping early despite the fact that her shift does not start until eight in the morning."

Heero nodded, "Yes that is because she is an efficient worker."

"No, buddy. No." Duo grinned, shaking his head slightly, "It is not that she is a good worker. It is that she is interested in you to the _extreme_. Almost to the point of being a stalker as she just kept getting here earlier and earlier in order to be here in the morning when you arrived. She likes you."

Heero frowned, "So I should socialize with her on the basis that she likes me. I have no feelings towards her; wouldn't it be wrong to date her?"

"Naw man! Not even close to being wrong. After all, you would be fulfilling one of her greatest desires, just by being with her." Duo grinned, "I believe she intends to make it worth your while. Plus a date is to see if you might eventually develop feelings for the other person. It will be good for you. You'll see if you would just say yes."

Heero frowned and leaned in closer to Duo, "What is the difference between her and Relena. I remember you referred to Relena as a stalker several times during the war and yet I never socialized with her before in this manner. In fact I believe you told me not to reinforce her behavior."

Duo shrugged, slowly and the decency to look sheepish, "Yeah, wellll- she is a political icon and she had all that baggage and she didn't run when you pulled a gun on her. I'm pretty positive that Shirley would run in the opposite direction if you did that soo….I say she's fair game."

Heero nodded, it was a fair assessment. Relena was a very important politician and Heero could never completely forget that he was responsible for countless deaths; it just wouldn't be right to attempt a date with her. "Alright. When do we socialize?"

"First off Heero. It's called a date. Second I will be helping you dress for it. And lastly it will be tonight." Duo reached across the table and patted Heero on the shoulder, "You're going to do great buddy."

* * *

TBC

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There we go! another week another chapter!

Hopefully also means another review! Or two...or three...or thousand. That would be sweet. Unlikely, but sweet.

Ciao!

-Silverserpent


	3. Chapter 3

Hey there.

So I know I've been neglecting a lot of other stories in favor of the Candle arc. But it is a HUGE FREAKING STORY. So this is my sad patheticly short attempt at a chapter for on of my other stories, because it says I have not updated since 08. That's pathetic. So here it is. The next chapter. It's short I know. At least it's there.

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Ch 03

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At three fifty-five pm Duo entered Heero's office with an excited look on his face. "You ready for tonight He-chan?"

Heero frowned at the normal butchering of his name and shook his head, still focused entirely on the computer screen in front of him. How could he be ready, when he had no instructions on how to date? He didn't even know what the purpose of such a meeting. "Well that's okay man! You ready to go?"

"Go where?"

Duo sighed in exasperation, "Shopping of course! What did you think you were going to wear tonight? You're Preventer Uniform? I think not! So let's hit the road buddy!"

Heero frowned and glanced at his computers clock before shaking his head. "No it is three fifty-seven. There is still three minutes left of work."

Duo shook his head, "Seriously man? You are going to stick around for just three minutes? Come on! Let's go!"

Heero shook his head again. "No. I get off at four pm. Wait until then." Duo sighed heavily before sinking to the floor with his back against the wall. He knew how stubborn Heero was after everything they had been through. If he said he was staying for three more minutes, nothing short of a terrorist attack or a direct order from Une would get him to leave early. Nothing. Not even the first date he would ever go on.

Duo was pretty positive that this was going to be an utter disaster, but at least it would get Heero's feet wet. And possibly make him more conscious of people around him and what they thought. Because if there was one thing that Heero didn't understand it was flirting. He wouldn't notice it if it was his Gundam in a tu-tu dancing the Macarena. He hadn't been raise with it in his awareness so it definitely didn't cross his receptors now.

Duo was determined to change that. Heero would know what everyone saw when they looked at him. He would be aware of how hunky everybody thought he was. That was Duo's goal.

Duo looked up at Heero when he started shutting down his laptop. Apparently four pm had arrived. "Now are you ready?" Duo groaned.

"Yes." Duo grinned at the short terse response and pushed himself off the floor. That was another thing he needed to work on, elaboration of his answers.

"Alright man, follow me."

----

The base was thumping annoyingly throughout the store's overly glossy painted red walls. Around him were sequined racks of buttoned shirts with various levels of embroidery. Nothing about this store seemed practical. In fact it was strange to Heero that any aspect of this store was at all appealing to the general public.

But for some reason Duo believed it was an excellent source or outlet to assist in his socializing capabilities. Heero was following behind Duo as he tore through the store picking up random shirts or pants or jeans or jackets or 'accessories' as he called them and handed them back to Heero.

The entire situation seemed to be...distasteful to Heero, but if Duo insisted that it would aid his endeavor at a date this evening then he would follow Duo's advice. He was a master at assimilation and socialization techniques. Heero had enough evidence of this throughout the entire war. Especially since he was able to go under the radar at so many enemy facilities despite being fifteen at the time and having a three foot braid down his back.

Duo danced off towards another rack before tossing another pair of pants on top of the pile. "Alright then." He turned and grinned at Heero. He pointed to the curtain at the back of the shop, "Go try each thing on and let me see what you look like."

"Why?" He grunted out.

Duo sighed dramatically, "We are trying to give you the perfect outfit for tonight. Think of it as under cover ops. If you wanted to pose as a cadet on an OZ base during the war, what would you have worn?"

"An oz cadet uniform." Heero stated. It was simple and logical.

Duo smiled and placed his hand on Heero's shoulder to direct him slowly towards the changing booths, "So if you were going to try and go on an undercover mission that required a date night at a club. What would you wear?"

"Appropriate date clothes?" Heero answered hesitantly.

But Duo laughed out, "Yeah! Now you're getting it buddy!"

Heero did not agree, but quickly slipped into a pair of tight jeans and a button up white top. He didn't bother buttoning it, since her would be changing soon anyways.

He stepped out from behind the curtain. Duo looked him up and down and let out a low whistle. "Wow Heero. You look good. Really good." You're going to need to button your shirt up in public of course, but this looks great on you."

Heero frowned and looked in the mirror on the wall next to him, "What makes me look good?"

Duo snickered a little and said, "Anything that shows off your assets Heero. So you're butt or your eyes or you're muscles."

Heero quirked an eyebrow, not quite understanding. "How does a shirt and a pair of pants show off my eyes?"

Duo sighed again and stated, "It's the color, Heero that sets off your eyes. Get a color wheel and study which colors you like next to the blues. Those are the ones that will make your eyes pop. Same thing for skin color or lips or hair. Anything that accents what you want to show off. Tight pants…" Duo pointed to his butt, "Show off that and your leg muscles. It's similar to spandex, but it doesn't show too much. Too much is bad. Always remember that rule."

Heero nodded and tried to digest. There did not appear to be any set of specific rules for clothing options, which was mildly irritating. How would one accurately monitor what was acceptable and what was not?

He went and changed into yet another outfit, as Duo called them, and listened to him prattle on about the different things to do or ask Shirley tonight. The different topics he could discuss ranged widely, but work seemed like a safe one according to Duo. Try to avoid past relationship topics or family issues. Open doors for her and pull out her chair for her.

So many pointless rules. Heero was beginning to regret this idea that Duo had for him.

Especially when he got to the counter with all of the clothes he was to purchase and walked out of the store with thirteen bags. Duo may have given him too many suggestions on clothing.

In the parking lot Duo said, "You will be meeting her at eight o' clock tonight, so don't be late. It's at the Cordova lounge. It turns into a night club at nine or nine thirty so you will be dancing at some point. From there go where the night takes you."

He smiled and hugged Heero while he was holding all his bags. No retaliation would be able to occur and he tucked something into Heero's back pocket.

Duo left from there in his own vehicle and Heero dropped the bags into his vehicle and headed home to prepare for this date.

First though he stopped at the hardware store and bought a color wheel. Duo said it would help set off his eyes, so studying it would be required before the date.

'Setting off ones eyes' was apparently necessary for a successful date.

* * *

TBC

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So there you have it. I will hopefully have another chapter up shortly. (Even if it's short). let me know what other stories you would like updated next. K peace.

^_^v


	4. Chapter 4

Alright! So I know it's been a while for this one and I'm slowly trying to remedy all these stories that have been on such a long pause. So here is the next chapter of a illier story then Cause and Effect.

I figure I should be allowed to keep two stories at a time going. For whn I'm in a happy mood or a serious mood from having bad days. So here we are:

Enjoy!

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Dating 101 - 04

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Heero arrived promptly on time for the evening's mission known as 'Date one: Shirley'. He had been wondering if this would be a good or bad idea still as he tugged lightly at his jeans trying to stretch them more than what was obviously being aloud. Duo said tight jeans were good jeans, so Heero did as he was told.

He entered the main lobby of the restaurant and noted that it was fairly dim-lit. Bad for visibility. Shirley was not in the waiting area. This made her late. Unacceptable.

A man waiting behind a podium began to approach him with a folder of sorts. "Can I help you?"

Heero glared at him instantly as he approached and stated, "No." The man quickly retreated to behind the desk. He also refused to look back up at Heero.

Heero was surveying the people of the room, waiting, when the door behind him started creaking open. He turned rapidly and observed that it was Shirley walking through the door, nine minutes late.

"Thanks for waiting! Hello!" She swooped in quickly and hugged him. Heero froze, but was relieved that she did not hold on. That would be bad. In fact that would be really bad. His hands were itching for the gun that he had tucked into his belt despite Duo telling him not to bring it.

"Let's get a table." She smiled and walked towards the man at the podium that had approached Heero earlier. Heero frowned at how nervous the man appeared to be as he led them to a table in the far corner of the facility. Heero was further concerned when Shirley took the seat that had her back to the wall. Heero wanted that seat; it was the most advantageous position in case of an incoming attack.

He stood for a minute next to the table wondering if he should request to switch seats with Shirley. Before any decision could be made though, Shirley asked, "What are you waiting for?" Heero repressed the urge to glare and sat across from her. Reciting one of the rules that Duo had ingrained in his head.

'Under no circumstances are you to glare at your date, Heero Yuy. Understand?'

Heero had memorized that as he had the color combinations that had been considered pleasing to the eye. He had also memorized a list of questions that would be good to ask for topics.

"Where are you from?" He asked.

She tilted her head to the side a little and replied, "A small suburb that is fifty miles from here."

Heero continued, "Do you have any pets?"

"Not at the moment. No, wait, I have a gold fish. And a big fluffy cat from the neighborhood stops by every once in a while. I call him Captain Mittens" She smiled. "How silly of me to have forgotten."

"What is your favorite type of food?"

"Mexican."

"Do you live in the city?"

"Six blocks from here. Why?"

"I'm simply asking questions to get to know you better as required on a date." Heero stated.

Shirley frowned a little, "Yes, well I feel like I'm being interrogated."

"Sorry. Maybe we should divert to the menus." Heero frowned. Two more rules in action. If she seems upset, apologize. If conversation is going badly direct towards food. Heero could do this. It was like a mission with a basic outline. It WAS do-able. Maybe.

They looked over the menus for a bit before the waiter came over. She ordered fettuccini alfredo, Heero noted that it was not the healthiest dish to eat. Heero had a salad with baked salmon on top. The waiter took away the menus and Shirley and Heero were left starring at each other. Shirley spoke up first, "So what did you do before you worked for the Preventers." Hm... Duo said avoid the topic of war.

"I fought in the war." Heero said and he looked away. That was a failure to follow the rules. Switch topics. Food. "Why did you select the fettuccini? It is not of much nutritional value."

She laughed, "Okay I get it you don't want to talk about the war. That's fine. Do you like working for the Preventers?" Work. That was safe.

Heero thought for a while, "Yes, I suppose so. It was a path that seemed appropriate following my...history."

Shirley nodded encouragingly, "Yes I know you're a Gundam pilot." Heero tensed. Was this a set up a trap? Did she want revenge for their actions during the war? "Duo mentioned it before, three months ago. You were the one that saved earth. That saved the world." Heero did not like it when citizens thought he was a hero as opposed to a killer, "I just want to let you know that I think you are the best a person in the world. I was so excited when Duo set this up for us. I never thought you would ask me out. No matter how early I got to work."

Heero's radar started ticking as he heard the stream of words coming out from this women's mouth. This was starting to seem a lot like the actions of Relena Peacecraft. During her pink faze. It was disturbing. Heero shuddered. Shirley reached across the table and placed her hand on Heero's shoulder, "Oh are you cold? You just shivered a little." She was rubbing in little circles, as if that would help warm him up. Foolish. Everyone who had field training knew that would do nothing.

Heero nodded, "I'm fine." And leaned back to break the contact. He didn't like it when other people touched him...it put him on edge.

The food came relatively quickly after the woman, Shirley, had been talking about her family and her old pet cat, Jo Jo. They ate relatively quietly except for the wom- Shirley chatting about her job, why she thought the Preventers were great, which was why she got involved as the front desk person and not at all because her Aunt Judy who worked in HR got her the job. At all, she clarified. Twice.

Heero broke in with a "This place turns into a dance club later in approximately twenty eight minutes. Do you enjoy dancing?" He was tired of hearing about a cat or the Aunt that did not in any way help her get the job except she interviewed her. Heero was certain that this was a violation of code.

She leaned across the table over their close to empty dishes, she had not eaten much he noticed, "I do, but I much prefer other things." She had dropped her voice an octave lower for some reason, but Heero did find it more appealing and easier on the ears.

"What sorts of things?" He asked back.

"Things that can be done at my place or your place." She fluttered her eyes a little. Perhaps there was dust in one of them. Heero did not know what could be done at his place. It was simple and clean. There was no TV. He had no board games like other people had.

Plus he did not like the idea of letting this woman into his place. It was too private and he had excellent security installed. He would not want to possibly ruin the security level of his compound. That would be an incompetent mistake to make. Better to go to her location as she requested.

"If you desire to go to one of our residences. Yours is much closer. It would be more efficient to go there." Heero said. It was logical perhaps she would tell him the plan as to what to do once they were at her home.

"Sounds wonderful!" She licked her lips and held her hand up for the check which arrived promptly.

As they were leaving the host slid away to avoid them. Perhaps he was intimidated. Strange behavior.

They walked together down the street. Shirley was still chatting when Heero felt something warm slip into his hand. He looked down startled; it was Shirley's hand.

Dang it. He had been captured without realizing what was happening. He had been too focused on the surroundings and potential sniper look outs. Careless.

Heero did not like this dating thing if it meant that people were allowed to gain entry into his personal space.

The residence was an apartment on the third floor of an older building. It was the basic lay out most city apartments with a living room, small kitchen, bathroom and what Heero presumed to be a small bedroom off the hallway.

Heero had been relieved when he was able to release her hand in the stairwell. It had been too tight to go up next to each other. Now in her apartment though he sat at the far end of the couch as she fluttered around fixing things or doing whatever it was that she was doing.

She disappeared into her bedroom and Heero still had no idea as to her motive of what to do. He needed advice. He pulled out his phone and texted Duo:

'I'm at her place. What do I do? We did not dance.'

A slow vibration thirty seconds later and Duo's response lit up the screen:

'Go with the flow. See what she has in mind. Enjoy yourself. '

So Heero pocketed his phone and made sure the gun was on safety again before he called out, "What do you have in mind?"

"I thought we could sit on the couch and watch a movie or something else more… interesting." Heero turned as he noted that Shirley had entered the room again. She was wearing a see-through material that did not appear to be of much use of keeping her warm though, the fake red fur covering her breasts might add a slight amount of warmth. But Heero doubted it, especially since now her pants were gone and she had some underwear that did not seem very practical.

Heero observed her leaning against the door and thought about what he knew… cinema diversions such as television shows or movies did not stimulate his brain that much. He could not see how it did anything for him in anyway. So he didn't much like it. "What things do you have that are interesting?" Maybe her balance was gone from the wine she had at dinner? Perhaps that was the reason she was leaning on the door.

When she moved it wasn't very gracefully, but it seemed as though that was trying to. It just seemed stilted and slightly clumsy, and she kept dragging her back foot. She came over and sat next to Heero on the couch. "Do you like what you see?" she said smiling broadly. Heero looked her over and nodded. Not that he particularly cared for the way she looked, but because Duo said it was good to compliment people not give them a direct analytical report.

And she wasn't bad looking either. No horrible scars marred her and she looked close to what the magazines seemed to think was pretty. But Heero had never really thought about what he liked and didn't like as far as peoples' exteriors. After all that meant nothing as to their fighting ability or ability to assassinate someone, exteriors were something that Heero did not normally pay attention to, but since she seemed to look like magazines then he supposed he should like what he saw.

Heero froze as she moved closer. Duo's number one rule to him was that he could not inflict damage to her at any point. He held his breath and tensed as she leaned forward and pressed her lips to his. They were wet and soft, but kind of sticky and strange. It wasn't the kissing that was necessarily repulsive. It was having someone in his personal space. Heero did not believe that he would have a problem if he needed to terminate her, but at the same time he did not believe she was an assassin either. Things could still be alright.

She moved closer to where she was almost sitting sideways on Heero as he faced the television screen, still unmoving and completely tense. He hadn't responded in kind and he hadn't done anything that people normally engaged in. He just sat there ramrod straight in his seat, trying hard not to shove Shirley across the room. She moved back to sitting next to him on the couch. A small frown creased her forehead. "Is something wrong Heero?"

Heero was trying to formulate the idea of 'I don't like people touching me' into words in a way that would not insult her when she spoke up again, "Oh! So Duo really wasn't joking when you said that you were inexperienced." She tilted her head to the side, "Well I could help you with that if you want. Or we could take it slow, maybe another time...?"

Heero jumped on that, "Yes, I think another time would be best." and he stood up quickly, facing her, but wanting to run for the door as quickly as he could.

She frowned and pouted a little. "Well okay then, I'm sorry that you won't be sticking around. How about two nights from now we'll go out again?" Heero nodded as it seemed to be the quickest way to get him out of the room. He turned and left swiftly.

Duo would need to be consulted. And possibly punched. He wasn't sure about that part yet.

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TBC...

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So what so you think! I hope you liked it. But I won't know without reviews. I am blind without them!

thanks!

-silverserpent


	5. Chapter 5

Hello! Here is the next chapter. Thank you so much for the reviews. this is definitely a more comedy oriented story then Cause and effect. So for those that don't enjoy that here's this. Or if you enjoy both!

Short chapter and I'm sorry about that!

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Ch 05

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When Heero walked into the Preventer lobby the next morning, Shirley was not at her desk, which allowed Heero to relax a little as he stepped into the elevator. That night had not been very restful. Not only had he not been able to go into his habitual routine before bed, his space had been invaded by a women who appeared to be exactly what Duo said- easy and unwilling to show up early unless it benefitted her in the form of going on a date with him. Heero didn't even know why people wanted to go on dates with other people. Why bother getting to know them beyond assessing their fighting capabilities and a potential threat assessment? It made no sense. As the elevator dinged open Heero saw Wufei over the tops of the cubicles and nodded before proceeding to his hallway as usual.

"Heero?"

He stopped at the sound of Wufei's voice. They rarely crossed over except for occasional mission reports or for mission situations that Duo deemed, 'An explosive ball of flames erupting out of nowhere.' He turned as Wufei approached him. "Hn?"

"Are you alright?" Wufei paused still five feet away. He tilted his head a fraction. He didn't look dumb, unlike that Shirley woman had.

Heero frowned, "I am physically at one hundred percent and mission operational."

Wufei grinned or smirked really. It was a strange and unfamiliar look on his face. "That's not what I meant. Is there a problem that seems to be troubling you?" He said clearly.

Heero nodded, but did not elaborate. "How did you know?"

Wufei shrugged, "I can read you well. You need that capability if you are to be a good interrogator. Plus you are running five minutes later than usual." Heero nodded at that. He was not sure about the reading people aspect, but the running late was an objective observation.

He hesitated, while Wufei stood there patiently waiting for Heero to select his words, "I should probably wait for Duo... He set me up on a date last night. I was... disturbed."

Wufei snorted and smothered a noise that sounded suspiciously like a laugh before stating blandly, "Yes. Well he told me something of this plan and while I warned him against it he has plowed on. I will therefore let you ask all questions to him. I do not think it fair that I spare him his pitfalls and triumphs that he will incur because of this. Good day, Yuy."

Heero nodded to Wufei who turned away to head back to his department to continue working and doing...whatever it was he happened to be doing at the moment. Once again Heero was struck with how strange it was that he had not wanted to be reassigned as an active agent in the field.

As Heero settled in to his work day of more missions to plan and operations to distribute, he did not bother paging Duo. He knew that as soon as he had arrived Duo would be at Heero's office wanting a full report on the date that he assisted in setting up. Heero looked at it as a disastrous failure simply because he had not known the parameters and expected outcomes of the date. He did not know the objectives other than a vague 'improvement of social skills.' What he did learn was that he really, really, really did not like people in his space and that the overarching theme that he had now learned twice from Shirley and Relena was not to be around the women that seemed to want him to the point of stalking. It did not seem to be the logical thing to do. But he was still supposed to go on a second date with this Shirley woman.

Heero shook his head and was disappointed to notice that he had now been staring blankly at his computer screen for twenty minutes. This was extremely counterproductive; he was supposed to be focusing on work. Not this trivial...drivel that he seemed to have to be dealing with now. It was not work related nor did it help to maintain his body in any way. It was a secondary mission outline that was not necessary to attain. Almost like a footnote. Perhaps he should scrap the whole project...

Two hours later when Duo showed up he didn't even bother to wait for Heero to acknowledge him. He came in and sat on the desk in front of Heero and was grinning. Heero leaned back in his chair and glared. He reached around Duo quickly and hit save before once again glaring at Duo.

"So? How did it go?"

Heero glared harder.

Duo cringed slightly. "Not good huh?"

Heero shook his head. "What was the point? She was late and she kept prattling about how she did or did not get her job. Or her cat. And then she kept touching me and she took me to her place and kissed me."

"Well that's progress!" Duo said enthusiastically. "We're just trying to break you into the whole situation of people in your immediate zone and the touching thing. You started letting me hug you and you don't freeze up entirely. I just thought she would be a willing teacher to let you get started into the whole physicality of being with people in a romantic-ish way. Like being around them in a non-work related setting."

"What do you mean? Define physicality."

Duo shrugged, looking at the ceiling and quietly said, "Well to begin with it would just people being in your proximity zone and hugging you or holding your hand but eventually... I mean." Duo was beginning to turn a little pink.

People who blushed usually did so when embarrassed which meant, "You mean it would lead to intercourse."

Duo laughed shortly but nodded. "Yes, that is exactly what I thought. It would be good for you to eventually experience and learn to reciprocate."

Heero nodded understanding, "And that is why you slipped the condom in the back of my jeans."

Duo nodded and grinned. "In case you needed it. But I guess that didn't go well so..."

"We are meeting again tomorrow." Heero stated abruptly.

Duo frowned. "Wait, you are going out again with her? That's good I guess."

Heero shrugged looking at nothing, "It was the only way to get out of her apartment."

Duo didn't quite know what to do with that. He looked at the ceiling and looked at Heero staring off into the distance and sighed. This may not have been the best idea on the planet it seemed. "Heero. You don't have to do this if you don't want to." Heero frowned at him.

"No I still think this has potential for improvement. I will continue."

"Alright then." Duo sighed. "Good luck!" and he left Heero's office. It was not with his usual energy Heero noticed but he had disappeared before Heero could inquire anymore. Heero reflected on his conversation with Duo and thought that perhaps it would be good to experience that arena of the social behavior. He would of course need to do research before the next day.

That night he headed off from work and went to the closest computer store he could find. He did not need anything fancy so he picked up a small laptop and took it home with him and installed the usual virus protection that he had made and modified himself. From there he when to the net's search engine and typed in 'sex'

Lots of topics came up. Books websites, pornography was mentioned multiple times; parenting forums came up, random chat rooms. And the first website he clicked on sent three viruses that his wall was able to block easily. He always heard that these sights were full of viruses, which is why he didn't bother looking it up on his laptop that he had had with him since the war. He had picked up the laptop specifically so he would not end up infecting his work computer with some form of malware.

He then typed in pornography. Millions of links came up. He clicked on the first one and began watching. He needed to learn as much as he could in as short a time as possible. He would not be going in blind to a mission again.

Only rookies in the field did that. And rookies ended up seriously injured or dead. There was no way he was going to let a woman like Shirley kill his mission. Or him. Not that it was likely, but you never knew.

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TBC...

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Well hope you liked it. It looks like Heero is starting to run his own mission outlines. I hope he doesn't get in trouble!

I know I should know what happen s. but I don't.

Ja!

-silverserpent


	6. Chapter 6

Well here we go! In case you haven't noticed with my other story Cause and Effect, I appear to be on a total updating kick. Which is wonderful. My goal is to continue this trend or at least something close to it. So here is the 5th update in 5 days. I hope you all enjoy.

On with the fic!

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Ch 06

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Heero's research turned out to be a very small sampling of what the Internet appeared to offer. The smallest fraction really. There appeared to be more pornography on the web then anything else Heero had ever researched. What was really limiting him before his date was not that he didn't do much of it, but simply time. There was too much information to process it all. It all amounted to a very confusing mess of information overload on Heero's part. Sex simply wasn't covered in his basic training camps that they had him train before being sent on his mission in the war. Hand to hand combat, shooting, infiltration, basic field medic training. He had it all before he was given his Gundam, but nowhere in all that training was sex education.

So pornography on the internet would become his tutor. When he didn't understand something initially he would research it on the computer using basic search engines. It made sense. But the problem was the diversity of it all. All the stars seemed to make loud moaning noises, but he didn't know if that was a pre-requisition of sex or if that was simply how those ladies did it. And the guys… The guys seemed to talk constantly asking if the woman liked it or if he was her daddy. Shouldn't that be information the man already knew? And if it was wasn't that an incestuous relationship, which was illegal under ESUN laws? Perhaps the Preventers needed to start looking into these strange cases.

Then there were fetish categories which seemed to be anything specific that was not considered normal. The problem was that Heero didn't know what normal was. And if his partner, Shirley, was into a specific kink how would he know. Would she some out and say it. How would he know if he liked it? The majority of the time during his research he maintained an erection, which would be good and he either dealt with it or ignored it like he had during the war. But he was a young male and quick research into that indicated that he was very much predisposed to that kind of a reaction because of hormones and fitness level. Apparently on average, people that were more fit wanted sex more and Heero knew that he was fit…

It was all very confusing. So after spending the majority of the night looking over web pages that had endless quantities of porn, he arrived at work at his usual time, slightly sleep deprived and needing to speak to Duo. The one thing he was very, very sure about was that if he would partake in any sexual intercourse, he would be using a condom. After researching venereal disease it was not something he was willing to risk… even if he was probably immune because of random vaccines and drug cocktails that Dr. J had given him when he was a pilot. Even if the porn stars didn't wear them he was going to.

When the clock was at ten past ten, he knew that Duo was somewhere in the building. He had to be by now. He left his office and attempted to search Duo's usual haunts. Across the room he could see Wufei giving a presentation to a team in the conference so Duo couldn't have been there. He went to the cafeteria, his office, the gym, and there was still no sign of Duo. So he elected to try the training area. Often times Duo would be giving pointers to new cadets and indeed he was there. He appeared to be teaching basic hand to hand technique to some of the new recruits. Heero approved of that position for him. Duo had excellent skills for working with people and he was skilled at fighting hand to hand combat.

When Duo caught sight of him, he began wrapping up his demonstration and handing it off to another instructor. The recruits saluted as he left the group and he waved them off. "What can I do for you Ro-ro?"

Heero frowned at the nick name, but let it slide because of the urgent need for information. His second date with this girl was tonight and she had made it clear that she was looking to have sex. Which Heero was pretty sure was the goal that Duo had set out for him in the beginning. Heero began walking down the hall with Duo who was heading to the cafeteria. He always ate after he demonstrated anything or worked out. "I need your assistance in deciphering some information I happened across when I was researching last night." Heero looked at Duo and tried to transfer the importance of the information by looking at him.

Duo frowned, "What is it buddy? Do you not know what kind of flowers to buy her for your date?"

Heero mimicked Duo's frown and stated, "I need to buy her flowers?"

Duo shook his head. "Never mind. What do you need help understanding?"

"What method do I use?"

They entered the cafeteria and stood in line, "Method?" Duo questioned. "Method for what?"

"For intercourse." Heero stated plainly.

Duo turned and looked at him flabbergasted and began turning bright red. "Shhh." He grabbed a sandwich and a juice and paid, while the lunch lady was looking between them with an eyebrow arched high and a smirk on her face. Duo motioned with his head for Heero to follow him and they went back to Duo's rarely used office. Once they were there Duo rounded on Heero. "What research did you do?!" His face was still pink.

"I went on the internet and looked up pornography. There are several sub-sectors and I appeared to have a positive reaction to almost all the images. Except when there were animals or deification involved. I'm fairly certain I won't be using those methods."

Duo look dumbfounded and frozen. His mouth started moving but no sound came out until he was able to clear his throat. "So… You researched on your computer and had a positive reaction?

"Yes. I had an erection."

"Okay… Did you… ya know. Take care of it?" Duo appeared to be fairly uncomfortable. Heero did not understand. It was just basic body function that everyone went through.

"You mean masturbate?" Heero asked. Duo nodded. "Yes. I did. I know how that functions. My primary concern is for the method of with another person. Shirley has made her intentions clear and I thought that you wanted me to perform well in this aspect of my dating as well?"

"Yeah…" Duo said squirming under Heero's intent gaze, "but there is other stuff involved in dating. Getting to know someone and seeing if you like them." Seeing if you want to be with them." Heero looked puzzled as Duo tried to lay out the distinction of what he was trying to outline for dating goals and parameters. It didn't really make too much sense, but Heero tried to focus on what was being said anyways. "So what will you be doing as a date today? What is your plans with her?"

"She wants me to meet up at her place for dinner and a movie. I presume that is a prequel for sex." Heero stated unabashed.

Duo's facial response was not one of joy as Heero had expected. The main emotions appeared to be confused and worried. Heero couldn't understand what would bring about this change in behavior. The last time Duo had slipped a condom into his pants and now he was concerned for Heero's well being. It was strange. All Heero wanted was to get it right. To used the right method. But if Duo was simply going to try to tell him not to do it… well.

"Thank you for your advice." He turned and left Duo. He was never one to back down from a mission and he was not about to start now.

He left Duo with his mouth hanging open quickly and began to return to his office. The man had not been helpful in an initial assessment of what to do in this situation. He stepped into the elevator to return to his floor, when Wufei also stepped in, probably returning from lunch.

"Wufei, if you were to have intercourse with someone for the first time what method would you use?"

Wufei turned silently and looked at Heero with an eyebrow raised. "Are you making a joke, Yuy?" Heero shook his head. And Wufei's face drew a frown across it. "Leave out all the kinks." He said and the elevator doors opened and he was gone.

Heero watched the his back retreat to the other end of the offices. It was better advice then what he had received from Duo so perhaps that was in fact the way to do it. No kinks. So all of the things pornography that had an extra category tag was probably out. He could work with that.

That night he returned to Shirley's apartment promptly at eight pm like they had decided upon previously. She had a pasta dish once again going on the stove and she set out three movies on her table for them to choose from. Heero let her pick, because he was not specifically interested in any of the movies. He only ever watched them when Duo got it in his brain to have movie marathon and he was somehow forced into it.

They sat on the couch with the pasta while the movie was playing and ate. She would talk occasionally, which Heero thought was strange, since then they would not be focusing on the movie. What was the point of having the movie playing if you were not going to watch it.

She took their plates into the kitchen when they were done and came back sitting slightly closer to Heero. He turned to look at her as she was entering his private space relatively closely and she literally pounced at him at that. Heero had to stop his reaction to punch her as her face came so close to his.

Her lips pressed to his and they were moist and plump and something tingled. He jerked his head back "What's that sensation? The tingling?" Was she trying to poison him? That would be unexpected.

"Sorry it's a limp-plumping balm." She flushed red, but determinedly pressed forward again. Heero allowed it despite his instincts telling him not to and the kissing began again. It wasn't particularly pleasant for him, but she seemed to enjoy the kissing aspect well enough.

Hands began slowly wriggling under his shirt and Heero allowed it to be removed then he thought perhaps he was supposed to do the same, so he grabbed the bottom of her shirt and pulled it off efficiently. Her hands started roaming over his body so he reciprocated. When one of his hands landed on her breast he was rather intrigued by how soft and fleshy it was. It didn't seem to excite him that much, but he had never examined one this close before either.

That was when he felt her palm his erection through his jeans. His breath hitched his heart rate increased. This reaction he recognized and he bucked up into the sensation. It felt different when someone else was doing the task. New. She whispered into his ear then, "You like that? It's going to get a lot better soon."

This was turning into quite an experience. Perhaps Duo had been right about expanding his daily activities.

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TBC...

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Well there you have it! Hope that was decent update. This story seems different from what I usually do and it is! But it isn't at the same time. At least not what I have planned for it. Hope you enjoyed!

-Silverserpent


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